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Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Orenda CleanBurnShape: 14/30 or 55/100

Good heavens, where have the last three days gone! Sucked up into a vortex of words is where; I've been playing Words of Wonder, passing level after mindless level, and I've just realized it's to disappear.  It's hard to accept I have fallen back into depressive habits, but recognizing it is half the battle to crawling back out of the trenches and away from the blasted computer.

Beginning tomorrow I will add flax meal back into  my daily regimen, either on my morning fruit or in my smoothie at lunch - my brain needs the additional omega 3's! I will also stop the morning decaf - as much as I crave the comfort of it to get through the morning's commute, it is definitely disrupting my sleep.  There is stress at both work and home right now, so I have booked myself a little vacation time. First with H this Saturday and then at the massage parlour Saturday next. That should help somewhat, and give me something (or things) positive to focus on.

On the bright side Kaylee, A and I took a walk down to the pond and back today after work; it felt good to be back in my monkey shoes and it wasn't until just now that I realized I made it the entire way without the pain in my chest making an appearance. Admittedly I was walking slow given the short-legged company, but so had I been all the other various times I have tried walking in the past year.  I think being lighter has made a difference! How's that for incentive to get back on plan 100%!

I have been using the CBS products, but everyday there is also something added in extra that I shouldn't have - left over chinese, vegan spaghetti made with quinoa and corn noodles, blue cheese dressing, a fast food bean burrito (or two) - and tonight's dessert, chocolate coconut milk ice cream! Just a very small helping, not the half pint that it would have been were H and I sharing a carton. But really - so many refined foods are definitely not part of the program. For shame, I seem to have gone a little nuts for all my battling. Once again I have turned to food for release from the constant worry and stress with which I find myself imbued. Oh, and a glass of red each night to 'turn off my worry button' as H puts it.

I need an outside project to pour my energies into - I have discovered that if I don't move I eat to calm down. How counter productive is that?!?  Lord knows there is still much to do around here; finish my room, the backyard, my taxes, the garage .... a little overwhelming if the list is examined too closely but all very doable as individual projects. 

Just Move, Vail. It's really very simple.

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