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Friday, May 1, 2015

Sugar Detox - Day 11/14

Today the boss treated the office to Thai food for lunch. We brought it in and played telestrations in the conference room. Not knowing what was in the sauces I opted for sauteed veggies not realizing they would come with a large serving of white rice. When you haven't had that in a while it is so decadent; starchy and delicious. Telestrations is a fun game - telephone with illustrations - and we break it out once in a while to play at work. Which is also nice for spending 'non working' time with the office crew.

It's 90 out today, and walking into a cool house was nice after the drive home in traffic. And now it's time to rest for a bit before the flurry and chaos of when Miss A enters stage left. I am so grateful for her every single day, no matter how tired I am or grumpy she always brings love and a reason to put my best foot forward. I don't always succeed, but more often than not we have a good time together. Today we played a short version of telestrations and I can see I need to pick up the game to have here at home now that she is reading.

Dinner was fast food on the way home, as embarrassing as that is. And worse yet, when the kids went down to Cream for dessert I asked for them to bring me back something too. Half a chocolate chip cookie ice cream sandwich. So good. So - full of sugar.

Part of change is HOW you do it, I have quoted this before, but I am not always able to find the gumption to care about being honest, open minded and willing. Does admitting I don't always care fall under the realm of honesty? This bothers me, but part of always being tired is that it is not only physical but mental as well. What a cop out. Where is my motivation. What happened to my enthusiasm and hopes for this sugar detox? And why can't I do it? I have to remember what I read - it isn't me, it's the addiction, and I just need to get through the beginning.  So I will do what I have always done and try not to feel insane in the process - start again tomorrow morning, bolster myself with reading, and infuse my body with nutrients as I clamber back up on the damn wagon.

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