A little Bright, a little Dim

Last night driving to the office I called a friend from my Master Mind group for support. This is the first time I have reached out with the intention of support for a long time, and it was good to hear a friendly voice who had encouraging things to say. She had listened to the same vlog I had, and reminded me it's better to be a little sad now than a lot sad later (post eating.) I did make it to work and back without driving through for anything, and it wasn't until much later lying in bed that the compulsion to eat overcame me and I ended up consuming a lot of dried mango.

In an effort to support myself, today I moved all of the nuts and dried fruit out of the pantry and into the garage. No one here besides me is eating them anyway, so they just shouldn't be in the house.

It was a good day; C and i made pizza from play dough, played games, and read a little. He is so silly - he wanted to camp out in a large cardboard box and ended up taking his nap there.  I worked on some decorations for the office while C was napping, and my meals were Bright all day as usual. The last two days I have been making chopped salads for lunch and eating my evening portion of veggies all cooked. The veggie, lentil soup is delicious with an ounce of cream cheese in it for my fat serving - a very stroganoff vibe and very satisfying to have a big bowl of mostly vegetables.

I need to be up early for groceries tomorrow, I think, I haven't taken stock of what arrived from Imperfect Produce today as the delivery was so late. We are always running out of apples, bananas, cauliflower, green onions & lettuce. And of course milk, Cal drinks so much of it, as do his sister and father. R and I have spoken briefly of weaning C off of it once his Chemo is over, it's so carcinogenic. But we can tell that it's soothing on his stomach. I have started keeping chocolate almond milk in the house for a break, and he loves it. I'll pick up some vanilla the next time I'm shopping and hopefully it's also a hit.

My feet are so cold, and while I could go find my slippers, I think I will turn in and start warming the bed.

I am so grateful that warmth is just a few feet away, how I wish it were so for everyone.