It has always seemed a paradox; how the days can fly past yet each one drag along at a snails pace. This day has lasted forever. Everything I touched at work became complicated, or a research project, or a fire to put out. It was hot hot hot on the walk to pick A up from daycare after work, and because of the heat we waited until late to go down to the pool. The water was perfect and it was almost 9:30 before we headed home.
I walked into my bedroom to find A sitting on my bed holding a framed picture of me holding Rhiannon and Joey in their Halloween costumes when her mother was her age now. She had the saddest little look on her face as she told me she missed her Uncle Joey. I was inspired to pull out the DVD I had made of all my old Super 8 films after he was gone so I wouldn't lose the footage; I had never played it for her and thought it would give her a better idea of who he was.
So the three of us girls gathered around the tv and we watched as Rhiannon grew from a toddler of one to a frolicsome four like A is now, and it was fun comparing the two of them and seeing so much of her mother in Alanna. And A, bless her heart as my Grandmother used to say, says, "you were a lot younger then, Grama!" How strange to see myself young and fit, and remember how fat I felt at the time. Oh to be that size again! But I'm working on it. And Joey as a baby, then crawling and toddling around. A agreed he was very cute!
So many in the footage that are gone now besides Joey; Uncle Billy, Jim, Aunt Beth. All of a sudden it's 11pm and A is still not in bed! And the air has become stifling with the blend of air conditioning and melancholia. The rest of the disc will have to wait until tomorrow.
I think the late swimming gave us all a second wind; thank heavens tomorrow is a Holiday and we can all sleep in. Well, one can hope anyway. In the meantime I am just a little sad, and missing the sweet little children that R and J were, and how happy I was being their Mommy. Life goes on, and for now I have A, and that's a good thing, and I am grateful.
I am looking forward to getting some things done around the house tomorrow, doing some more swimming, and getting a walk in if I am up before the heat. It's a Clean day on the CBS plan, and I always look forward to those. Tomorrow will be a little different since I won't be at work, but I have plenty to keep myself busy and out of the fridge. Speaking of which I need to make an early pit stop at the store for veggies before the crazy holiday shoppers are out and about; I had better get my owahzoo to bed!
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