Another 1.2 lbs gone this week; and only another 1.2 to go until I reach the 20lb mark. I've never ever lost this much while on a 'diet', I think I topped out at 12lbs as the most ever lost while dieting. I did lose 50lbs once over the course of three years while eating for nutrition, but for most of that time I was out of work and had time each day to shop and prep and cook. But once back to work it was not sustainable. The same muscles I use to chop veggies were being used at the keyboard, and my back pain would flair and pinch.
It really was a series of unfortunate events, going back to work for Open Heart Kitchen I would start my shift by assigning volunteers to portion and wrap all of the bakery items donated by local restaurants and grocery stores. That was the beginning of a downward spiral with sugar and flour. At the time my 2nd job was in project management that kept me driving all over the Bay Area, and it didn't take long to start driving through for fast food while on the road. I did try to make 'healthy' choices; bean burritos from the Green Chilie's menu at Carl's Jr., or veggie burgers from Burger King. I knew they were still awful for me, but I was busy, tired, and really depressed at having two part time jobs that each paid less than $15/hr. I mean really.
But those three years I didn't feel like I was dieting, I was eating for nutrition and feeding my body. And it's those years that gave me the foundation to succeed now. Because again, I do not feel like I am dieting. My focus is on healing my brain and taking care of myself the best I can. Even when I splurge or break a Bright Line it's a momentary thing, not a dramatic Oh My God I've failed! No, it's just me being human and I have never been so ready to forgive myself and keep moving forward. I love the quote they used in Frozen, about doing the next right thing. That was me yesterday after having the chocolate, I was immediately ready to do the next right thing. So I drove home hungry, and shopped, and waited to eat a Bright Line dinner.
I'll have to check in later about today's meals. I had a yummy breakfast but need to cook. There are black eyed peas and knockworst to make, there are garbanzos and celery for lettuce wraps, and beans and tomatoes to make soup. I'm just not sure what I will cook today for dinner. There are left overs from dinner last night that I can have for lunch, so no hurry and no stress.
It's beautiful out, in the 60's and sunny. We are chatting about how we want to set up the garden this year, and have seeds to get in our little milk-jug green houses. So fun! The dirt patch will be melons and squash, we'll have a raised bed of corn, one for tomatoes, one for peppers, and the fourth is still a mystery Then snap peas and maybe beans too to grow against a rail on the fence. Oh, and we are going to splurge and buy a strawberry pot - they were so delicious last summer and we all want those again, just more of them!
------------------------------
1 pint black eyed peas
3 carrots chopped
1 bunch celery heart, leaves and all
1 really large onion, diced and sauteed
3C chopped green cabbage
12 oz diced Knockwurst
32 oz canned diced tomatoes
1 qt chicken stock
21 spice TJ's seasoning, Oregano, 3 bay leaves
Bring to a boil and simmer 2.5 hours
I didn't check the ingredients in the seasoning mix, but for sure there must be salt because the soup is salty. Not in a bad way, just intense compared to how I've been cooking since starting on blood pressure meds half a dozen years ago or thereabouts. R roasted sweet potatoes and onions, and I pulled turkey meatballs out of the freezer to make a couple more meals with my share for a total of six new lunches or dinners, plus there are two chili dishes left over from last week and two oatmeal breakfast dishes in the fridge.
(b) Raisin bread, cheese, banana
(l) Knackwurst and corn
(d) Lasagna, cabbage & romaine salad
(d) Half a brownie
Up to now I have been able to abstain from eating the brownies that show up so often. Fresh baked and full of chocolate chips it was just too much. And honestly, I usually do have a little bite of something on Saturdays - a sort of treat on the day I weigh-in. So I guess I still do play head games with the scale after all - knowing I have the full week ahead to 'be good'. SIGH.
No comments:
Post a Comment