All the Things

It's Friday Night. I've had dinner. I want to eat. I'm not craving anything, I just miss eating in front of the TV and disappearing for a while. I have a cup of herbal tea brewing, I'm writing out my thoughts, and I'll watch a vlog or two or three until this feeling goes away. I'll do all the things I know to combat this assault to my brain. Because that's all it is. My body doesn't need the fuel, my mouth doesn't really want to eat because I had prep work done by the dentist for my appointment tomorrow and I can't chew on the left side tonight. Just getting through dinner was a slow going affair, so why on earth do I still want to eat.

It's more the idea of eating. Visions of sitting with a box of chocolate or tub of popcorn is so inviting right now, it's just ridiculous. I feel like my saboteur is just a big fat bully, pressing buttons to get my attention. To take my focus off my goals and dreams and give in to my addiction. "You Shall Not Pass."  I am Gandalf standing with staff in hands, holding off the beast that is trying to break down my walls.

Or, as C would say, "Go Away!"  He is very clear about pushing away anything he doesn't want. He is more clear at 2 than I am at 64. Many times today I said, "Not My Food' while passing by a tempting morsel, so I am not totally incompetent. I just need my brain to fall in line with my wants instead of my saboteurs. I just need the crazy person in my head to leave me alone.  "Go Away!!"

(b)  peppered salami, triscuits, strawberries
(l)  knockwurst, roasted veggies, apple
(d)  knockwurst, roasted veggies, mixed veggies

Lunch was so good today I had it again for dinner.

I have an early morning appointment tomorrow at the dentist, and I won't feel like eating for a while after returning. I'll set some grains soaking tonight for when I get hungry and need something warm, comforting and easy to eat. I may eat breakfast all day; scrambled eggs, yogurt and fruit, cottage cheese. Not being able to chew will not keep me from eating, and I'll maintain my Bright Lines.

I just need to get through this evening. And I will; I've got moves :)