BLE: Easter thoughts

The fridge is packed with food for tomorrow, and for the first time in  my life Easter dinner will not include brown bread.  And there will be a pork roast instead of a ham. And no coleslaw. Am i okay with this? Yes. We are adding lots of veggies to the pan to roast along with the pork, and I've eaten enough brown bread to last me a lifetime. I can visualize the bite of ham, coleslaw, and brown bread so perfectly that I can actually taste it.  It's enough, and tomorrow we will be Bright for all three meals.

Of course it is a little disconcerting to see the package of cinnamon rolls in the fridge, ready to bake of in the morning for the family. And to know R is baking some banana bread tonight for her honey to use up the brown bananas. "You're killing me smalls!", I toss out at her as I leave the room to come and write. But it's all good. We are so used to having NMF (not my food) lying about, rejects from trying to tempt Cal to eat, that these planned treats are just a couple more in the long litany of items that shall not be eaten.

I'm looking forward to the usual holiday tasks; buying flowers, making the house look nice, hiding eggs for when the family returns home from Church. Bless R for taking the kids down to meet M at the church. How differently we will all celebrate tomorrow, but even in our differences, it's just all about the love.

What a beautiful prevening it is outside my window. Lawns fresh with new growth spreading down the street to join the golf course, white and grey clouds streaking across a blue spring sky, and a cool wind tossing the leaves about on trees, making them look as though they had something important to share.

I am grateful this evening to be colouring eggs with my daughter, and hopeful that A will join us. Searching back for Easter it almost hurts to realize how much time we once spent together, but then I take a moment to remember to be grateful that we had that time together. I know we will be close again one day, but I am sure that 12 is as trying these days for her as when it was my turn to be filled with the angst and frustration of being a pre-teen. You know, back when I knew everything. So I give her space so she can take her turn at this pivotal point in her life.  But I want her back, and practice patience and love at every turn in anticipation of that day.

Time to go draw with black wax on eggs and make a mess of what should be a beautiful art project.