Up point 7, less than a pound, at the weekly weigh-in. Given how many bites off plan I had been over the course of the week, and even one splurge from the bakery, I was grateful it hadn't been more. The coughing continues, followed closely on it's heels by depression, but I have tools to fight with, and most of the time I win my little battles. Something clicked last Wednesday and I have been Bright, day and night, since then. Having two Bright nights under my belt at the weigh-in probably saved me from an encounter with despair, so I am thankful for the timing.
Or course I had to sit down with my paper journal and do the math; how many weeks until we leave, what I might expect to lose by then if I were to stay bright, how I will feel about myself if I don't. On and on, you know. All told, I am down about half a pound since the start, so still in maintenance as has been the case since about February of 2020. I am hoping that this current calm and acceptance continues long enough to see some real progress. Because the BLE saying is true, that while 100% is easy, 99% is really hard.
After my video Dr. appt. I have upped my inhaler dose, and after three nights sleeping with a warm mist humidifier the coughing has abated somewhat today. Thank heavens, because I was getting closer to crazy than I like to venture. The Doc also ordered the cough meds I requested, but they had to be ordered and won't be in at the pharmacy until Monday or Tuesday. Sometimes I feel that all of my energy is going towards not coughing, and I hate how unfair it is to Cal. My goal has been to rest which shortens our walks, and has completely cast out our little games of 'go tag'. I feel for him, and I know this will pass, so after three solid weeks of this crap I am giving myself a break and not fretting about the exhaustion. And I'm using my IFS tools to keep the panicky parts of myself at bay.
Today's food:
- b) cheese & triscuits, banana & grapes (first cheese in a week)
- l) red pepper hummus, yellow squash, mixed nuts, strawberries & grapes
- d) cauliflower rice w/ onions & nutritional yeast, black beans, salsa, corn
Dinner was too heavy with a full serving of beans and corn. I put the leftovers away to use or throw away tomorrow. I have a new bag of Nutritional yeast to try, and I'm looking forward to playing around with it. Guess I'll need to pick up some raw cashews.
Having forgotten to publish this Friday, I am doing so now.
Sitting in a warm steamy room is not conducive to staying upright and typing. I feel a Saturday afternoon nap coming on, the pull from the bed suddenly irresistible. Sometimes it's not such a bad thing to live in very close quarters; it's literally one step from my desk chair to a nap.
- SW: 202.1
- CW: 201.7
No comments:
Post a Comment