This space of time each year is a roller coaster of feelings; Mom's birthday, Valentines Day, Joey's D-Day. And I am still not well. And being unwell for so long makes me too emotional. And of course I am still fat, which makes me crazy. I am too far away to have spent time with Mom, I'm breaking up with my sweetheart, and 2/16 is always just plain hard.
I heard a new twist on, 'how we spend our days is how we spend our life'. It goes something like, 'how we invest our love is how we enrich our lives'. It's hard to foster love when you shut yourself in and make your world really small. I feel I am wasting my heart's capacity to love, that I am withering in some way by not expanding my experience of life.
But there are those I do love fiercely, and I think that as long as I feel the possibility of love all is not lost.
To bed, perchance to dream.
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