Food and exercise to the rescue!

The day improves.

Specifically corn pancakes at Denica's where they were having a fund raiser for A's school. Delicious. Upon arriving home and taking a quick assessment of the work to do in the back yard I decided a trip to buy flowers was in order first- incentive, or a bribe - so that there was something to look forward to after the cleaning up of the cement patio. And a tomatoe plant too was in the basket to come home, no apologies for the 'e'.

After an hour I am exhausted and instead of pushing through I am allowing myself a break to cool down and hydrate before going back out to work. I'm in the worst shape of my life and don't want to collapse doing yard work! But my mental health has recovered it's Pollyanna demeanor; it's too bad we can't remember the hill to come while wallowing in the depths, that would be ever so helpful.

To water, to put my feet up, and then back to work.

Final update: that was the pattern all day, work, hydrate and a brief rest - then repeat. A long productive day at last! R and I made a huge dent in the back yard, and are both sore and weary tonight. Most of the new flowers are freshly potted, there is a  junk pile ready for the dump, and things are looking up. A vast improvement. Hopefully tomorrow I can get out there after work each day and keep up the momentum.

Side note: the orange tree is thick with fragrant, white, waxy flowers and a'buzzing with bees. Wonderful but scary, we steered clear.

Grumpy Pants

That's me this morning, not sure why. Yesterday I began a determined effort to get back to eating for health and weighed out two pounds of veggies; the intention was to eat half of them raw and half cooked.

The raw half was in fact eaten, but the cooked half turned out to be beet soup and i somehow never ate any of it despite how delicious it was and beautiful to look at too. Rats, I should have posted a picture! I'll do that later.

So what was dinner then? Top Ramen, and a vanilla shake for dessert. I did get quite a bit done yesterday, managing to stay on  my fee for at least half the day. But I ache and there was never really a sense of accomplishment; even after mowing the lawn all I could see was how much was left to do.

So obviously this is a mind thing, and I need to get over 'it' or myself or whatever. Happiness has managed to sneak away while I wasn't paying attention, and I just don't have the energy to track it down right now. The old adage of pretending until it's real is exhausting just to think about.

No, this is not me giving up, it's just me ranting to the universe in an attempt to piss myself off and find some get up and go.

Said as my hands are tingling as I type. Bother.