Sun Rot

Driving south to visit my Mother I had a few hours to think, and found my thoughts drifting in and out of the wreck of a relationship I was leaving at home for a few days.  And the vision that kept coming up was how my life had become like a bag that had been left out in the sun too long. There I was strolling along the beach in a wasteland of sand and sun and small broken branches when a small glimmer caught my eye. I go to pick up what looks to be a linen sack and as I begin to lift it up out of the sand it falls apart in my hands, the small weathered pieces falling between my fingers and drifting off into the wind scattering into a 'thousand little pieces', so to say. This is such a strong daydream that it is more like a memory; a very disturbing moment of de ja vu. I immediately grasp the obvious, that it is pointless to try and put back together what had fallen apart so completely.  Something entirely new would have to be forged out of this debri, or maybe it would be best to just sweep it up and put it out at the curb. But it is clear, the time has come to use a 'get out of limbo free' card and start moving the piece of my choosing along the game board.  Sorry, sitting here typing away in my Mother's house I guess it's easy to revert to childish allegories.

I am looking forward to spending a few days caring for my Mom and for myself. The pity train tends to serve fast food garbage and I need some extra greens and exercise in my life right now. I know that one full day of taking care of the details is all it takes to switch trains and get the healthmobile back on track. Bless her heart, there is a bag of dark chocolate covered power berries on the night stand next to my bed; it will be a healthy few days :)